I hate that I'm an emotional eater.
I hate that when I feel like the inside of me is coming apart at the seams, I want to fix it by stuffing food in my mouth. Chocolate, candy, cake, anything that's going to comfort me.
I hate that i let people have so much control over my emotions, that in turn, they control me.
I really wanna slam down some cookies right now. Like the whole fuckin' pack. With a big ass glass of milk to wash it all down. But instead, i opted for blogging hoping by the time I'm finished i wont feel that compulsive need to eat. I'm slowly learning that I need to cut people out of my life when i get to a point that I'm questioning why they are still there to begin with. If you have to question relationships of any kind, chances are it's because they aren't very healthy for you.
I need to learn different outlets for coping with stress. Every outlet I've ever had has been unhealthy. As a kid, I self-injured. Cutting+. Now i eat & eat till i start to feel sick. I've even had a small run in with binging and purging, till i just stopped the purging & gained the weight.
Isn't it amazing how, your whole day can be so great, in almost every aspect. & then one thing, or one person can fuck up your entire night? yea. I think I'm going to just try & sleep. Which is better than eating & stressing ha. It's just a matter of if i can fall asleep or not.
erica♥
exercising is the best way to kill the stress. It's really revitalizing
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